Easily Hurt ....

It was nice when we were children - have a fight with anyone - say sorry easily - forgive easily - ego was small. Friends were closer - but then i grew older. Though i thought i was getting stronger - actually my power to 'not' get hurt was reducing.



"How could he do that" - would stay till the next time i wanted to play - but now it leaves scars which take eons to repair. Friendships are but a bit hollower when the heart is scared to get hurt. Close ones have so much power to hurt - but why did they get stronger when i grew older. Mother's shout did hurt that much earlier - but now anger courses when they talk against me ????



Is this the 'PRIDE' of getting older ?



Then to protect from getting hurt - i keep distance - a few handful of those whom i open up to have been given too much a power to hurt me. Dependency of a sort which i hate to lose. Neither can i tolerate differences in opinion.



Little fights have started to stay for so long that i forgot how to forgive and forget and get on with the new day. A new chance to play. Revenge lingers in dark corners - which i have not cleaned for a long time. Dirt of anger stacking in layers on the glass not allowing me to see clearly even in daylight.



I want to return to innocence - when i was stronger.

Desires Play

Its amazing how desires play
Rising and falling they make you sway
How perception changes reality
How care gives way to hostility

How colors change under the thoughts
Under the fear of 'you might get not'
How it fuels anger, hurt and pain
When what you want is not to gain

How the right and wrong blurs distinction
And action follows desire's compulsion
And the intelligent beings with the smartest brain
Become foolish, careless and go insane

The scope of thoughts narrows down to just you
The selfish wants tell you what to do
I did it because i wanted it so
Today is done - next wish - tomorrow